Limewire >>>>>>>>> Spotify
I'm really sick of my dependency on my phone. I haaate that I wake up everyday, check it, then get immediately overwhelmed/overinvested and when I finally put it down I remember: background noise. So I've gotta pick it back up and open Spotify or Youtube, and then I'm back scrolling for x minutes trying to wade through all the shit to just find something to fill the silence.
I know I could just go directly to a playlist or click on a favourite video but what if I'm not sure what I'm in the mood for? Then I'm scrolling and scrolling and scrolling. These apps are fully dedicated to making you spend time there so it's not just my lack of self control. The apps are designed to work against you living your life, they're designed to make you feed the shareholders money with your lifetime.
So I'm flirting with the idea of taking all the crap off my phone. I wanna delete the Amazon app, so if I need to buy something (I know, I know, Amazon IS bad and I try not to use it but often things just aren't available anywhere else) I'll have to fire up the computer. That's a small thing though, the BIG THING, the hard mode -- deleting Spotify.
I've resurrected my external harddrive with all my old music collection on, and I'm writing a list of albums I want to get. It's going to be an outrageously slow process because my music collection ends very sharply in like... 2014, and in the last 10 years my tastes and discoveries have expanded out of my control.
Still, I used to have a much more controlled relationship with music, one I actually led myself and truly appreciated. The hours tagging and burning CDs were rough but I remember those CDs in a way I don't remember my Spotify playlists. Listening to a bunch of algo-recommended bullshit sounds AMAZING, wow the discovery! the choice! the feeling of superiority when you find an artist no one knows! but in truth it just plays past my ears like stuff on the speakers at a store. At best I might be like :D oh nice and at worst I'm annoyed, pick up my phone and start skipping songs for minutes, and then I look at my notifications and the physical world leaves the chat for an hour or two. Or three.
Anyway, mindless ramble. I want to delete Spotify. I want to return to my own, personal, music listening habits. I want to listen to albums the whole way through and have favourite artists again. I want to stop handing over money every month for something that usually just pisses me off and overwhelms me. I want to get away from listening to shit I don't even like for hours a day because I'm scared to look at my phone and be consumed but 300 other things demanding attention. I want to not waste hours on my phone because Spotify played one three minute song I wasn't feeling at that moment. I want to have the mental clarity that comes from not being overwhelmed by choice 24/7.
Also I just wanna scrawl out blog posts sometimes. Hi.
Maybe I'll get an MP3 player again, so it's just the music and nothing else.